That Was Just as Bad as it Gets. What the Hell Were They Thinking?

 I have been a fan of G.I.Joe since the rebirth of it back in the early 80s.

My first G.I.Joe action figure was the original Snake-Eyes because I thought he looked really cool.

The comics by Larry Hama was the first comic book series I collected, starting randomly with issue 12 titled 'Three Strikes for Snake-Eyes' and then regularly with issue 22 and I kept collecting the series all the way to the final issue.

I watched the cartoon, but I remember never being that interested in it. The comics were so much better.

The two live action films did not impress me at all. They were just so poorly done. They showed they had no idea what they were doing, especially when the tried to redo Snake-Eye's story, which they failed with big time.

So when they announced they were going to do a live action Snake-Eyes movie to try and reboot the franchise, I was not expecting much at all. I had no faith and no real interest in seeing the film

Found out it was streaming and decided to check to see if I was justified in my judgement.

Wow was I ever right.

The film is really, really about as bad as it gets on every level.

There was no story or plot. You don't care at all about any of the characters. They made Snake-Eyes uninteresting, with nothing badass about him, as he does nothing throughout the film, with no scenes at all showing him developing skills. They forced in appearances by Scarlet and The Baroness just to have them in the film as they do nothing in the little screen time they are given.

And as an action film it is lacking in action. They are really only two action scenes and those scenes are nothing special at all.

The actors themselves don't really seem to care, with none of them seeming to put much effort into their performances as they really did not seem to know their characters at all.

There really is nothing worth watching in this film. they don't even give Snake-Eyes his signature look until right at the end of the film, you know the look all the actions figures are based off of.

As shown in the comics, Snake-Eyes was a mysterious, skillful character and as the story of his life was revealed we learn just complex a person he was, with so much  of a layered, uniquely tragic backstory that gave him such depth. The movie took all of that away and left us with a cliché backstory and an uninteresting character with simple, boring motivations.

There are bad movies I will defend on some level, with films like 'X-Men's Origins: Wolverine' being worth watching for the first ten minutes or so and there being other watchable elements in it. I cannot say anything like that about Snake-Eyes. There was no point of the film I felt was worth watching.

This was film as that regretfully failed to live up to even my low expectations for it. I mean at least I was hoping for some intense fight scenes, but those were fully absent.

While the G.I.Joe franchise as a whole is still going well using the strength of nostalgia for the 80s, the live action film side of things is most likely dead at this point. This marks three failed films in a row and that is something hard to come back from. And even as fan, I will be happy if they never try to do a live action film again.

Some things are better left alone.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Now That Was One Geeky Conversation

My son and I were out doing some Pokemon hunting today.  We got talking about how the Remoraid (A sardine like fish style Pokemon) makes no sense at all to evolve into a Octillery (Basically an octopus like Pokemon). It is the kind of thing that makes it very clear the creators of Pokemon were on drugs while watching Animal Planet when they came up with most of these creatures and their evolutions. We went through most of the Pokemon and made judgement calls as to how much sense the evolutions made. I think less than half of them really looked right. The creators clearly didn't care at all about logic or study nature when they came up with most of them. They have a basic teddy bear somehow turning into a monster grizzly bear with nothing more than them being bears connecting them, as they physically are clearly not the same species. There is a fat flying rabbit/squirrel then somehow becomes a ferret. Seriously, WTF were they on? And of course if you get enough gold fish (Known ...
Read more

Disharmony of the Spheres

My story 'Time of the Bursting' has been published in the anthology 'Disharmony of the Spheres: http://nomadicdeliriumpress.com/blog/product/disharmony-of-the-spheres/ It is an anthology of stories that focus on mental illness. This is the most meaningful anthology I have been in. Half the profits from this book will go to the Yellow Ribbon Suicide Prevention Organization, a group that battles teen suicide. The following is from the product description. "Mental illness is very common in our society, but it’s also very misunderstood. Many view those with mental illnesses as being weak, but there is a great deal of strength in those that must battle their own minds on a regular basis. Disharmony of the Spheres focuses on characters with mental illnesses that are still able to be successful. They may not completely overcome their illnesses, but they are able to beat them back and succeed."
Read more

And His Time Is About To Come To An End

Twenty-Seven hours until the beginning of the end of the 11th Doctor. Since BBC America started airing Doctor Who we have been getting the new episodes the same night as they air on BBC One back in the UK, instead of waiting months for them.  That means that we get the Christmas Specials on Christmas Day, making it so Christmas Day ends with a nice little gift. This year's the episode is 'The Time of The Doctor' and will be the end for the 11th Doctor. Supposedly we will also get answers to just about all the big questions still out there from the last few years. We'll see how that goes. We will also be introduced to the 12th Doctor, although most likely this will not give us much of an idea of the character.  We'll have to wait till fall next year for the new season to start up to see just what the new Doctor is like. It is going to be a long wait.
Read more